You know that old jingle, the one that goes: “I wish I was an Oscar Mayer Wiener, that is what I’d truly like to be, ’cause if I were an Oscar Mayer Wiener, everyone would be in love with me!”
This dish is what happens after you’ve been dating the beloved Oscar Mayer Wiener for a while, and start discovering some strange habits — like swimming in French dressing with lima beans.
- 1 package (1 lb.) Oscar Mayer Wieners
- 1 can (15 oz.) kidney beans, drained
- 1 package (10 oz.) frozen lima beans, cooked and drained
- ¾ cup chopped dill pickle
- ½ cup sliced onion
- ½ cup French dressing
- 1 medium head lettuce
- 2 hard-cooked eggs, sliced
- Cut wieners into thin slices; combine with kidney beans, lima beans, pickle and onion in large bowl. Stir in dressing. Chill thoroughly.
- Just before serving, line salad bowl with leaves of lettuce. Break remaining lettuce into chunks. Add hard-cooked eggs and lettuce chunks to wiener mixture. Toss lightly.
- Spoon into lettuce-lined salad bowl. Makes 5 servings.
I expected the lima beans to be the problem with this. After all, they’re a punch line—the go-to vegetable that everybody loves to hate.
As soon as ingredients started coming together, it started looking… weird. All of it. Not just the lima beans.
But after mixing, it looked a little more reasonable. Until you notice the wiener slices hiding under the beans and onions, lying in wait.
After it had chilled for a while, I asked Buzz to put it into a bowl, along with lettuce and eggs. He decided to put the egg slices on top rather than mix them in; considering it hides all the crap, it was a very good choice.
Buzz laughed when he looking at his plate. It’s that sort of resigned, nervous, and regretful laugh that comes when you know something’s going to be pretty bad, but you are going to have to eat it anyway.
So he took a bite, chewed, and grimaced. “Uh-oh. No good?”
“Never put French dressing on hot dogs.”
The Verdict: Pretty bad. Why, Oscar Mayer Wieners, why?
From the tasting notes:
There were some weird things about this recipe. French dressing and hot dogs don’t play well together. Wieners don’t taste good cold. Pickles and hard-boiled eggs didn’t add much to the overall flavor. Once you get past all that, the two kinds of beans (particularly lima) were fairly tasty when mixed with onions, lettuce, and dressing. Serve it to people you mildly dislike who want to eat a lot of protein.