Pillsbury's Bake Off 21001

I hope I am not coming on too strong when I say there is nothing like a vintage Pillsbury Bake-Off Cookbook. Nothing. They are pretty much great from cover to cover.  The awkward pictures. The hilarious food combinations. The desperate need to have “Mrs.” in front of every contestant’s name. The fluff-filled, saccharine “backstories” behind every triple-bleached goo-filled entry. Every yearly edition is a gold mine.

This particular book is no exception. The 1970 Bake Off was filled with hope, references to fat husbands, and copious amounts of flour.

Oh, and needless improvements on classic, standby meals.

Sloppy Joe Pie001

Why would someone want to put Sloppy Joes into a pie? It makes no SENSE!

Sloppy Joe Pie001

Now, I have made Sloppy Joes a couple of hundred times in my life.  And I am pretty darn sure it takes less than 25 mins to throw them together. Even less if you use a can of Manwich. Why would I want to turn Sloppy Joes into an hour-long ordeal?

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“Wow, Honey!  You know how much I love a dinner that looks like a multi-eyed space monster who is about to devour me!”

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No, that foil ball isn’t drugs. It’s frozen meat. I swear.

You only WISH it was drugs!

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And now I wish it was drugs, too.

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Okay, whose idea was it to put soup in the crust?

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Oh.

Mrs. Doster.

Right.

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By the by, this crust may look fine, but it smelled AWFUL!

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Okay, whose idea was it to put three eggs into condensed tomato soup?

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Oh.

Right.

The contest.

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Notice, no extra seasonings in the meat.

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Oh, here is all the flavor. In this slimy, snot-like layer.

Yummy.

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A circle of olives makes it aaalllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll better.

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Fresh from the 10 minute rest.

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Oh God! Someone ate our pie already and then barfed it back into the shell!

What? It’s supposed to look like that?  Who in the heck would want to serve a pie that looks like it has been pre-chewed?

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Oh, that Mrs. Doster.

What a card.

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This is indifferent shrugging, not involuntary gagging.

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The Verdict: Okay. The tomato soup layer was gross. If two of those eggs were left out and the tomato soup snot would have been mixed into the meat it would have been a lot better.  The crust was surprisingly good. After the way it smelled in prep I thought it would taste like smelly socks, but it was the best part of the “pie”.  The crumbled crust and cheese on top was actually a good touch, too.

So close, Mrs. Doster!  Maybe next year?

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Awww. How can you not love a face like that???

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